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Moving to LA was incredibly challenging—not just figuring out the logistics and being realisitic$$ in the physical reality of facts lol but also, most importantly ….leaving room for infinite flow and trust in the universe to make this expansion possible, to have the courage to step into your delusions but also be grounded in reality. Oooffffff..
One of the hardest parts of the move was knowing I had to set aside the basket top and dress styles because they were way too involved to make and so time consuming esp with the embroidery. It was terrifying, but I knew it was time to let them go for several reasons. For Zhinh, they were the 'bread and butter' of the brand—the consistent product people saw first, followed for, purchased, and kept returning for with every shop release and some people even returning to buy there 3rd 4th or 6th basket top !!.and not only that, but the only design that I had somewhat of a solid system for, to create. I had this deep fear that I would disappoint everyone with this decision and also faced with the question….what can I create thats equally as dense thats less time and energy consuming? How will Zhinh even survive in LA if I were to put these to rest? Gahh all I know is that I dont want to only be making embroidered basket tops and dresses for the rest of my life and know this was a real issue to be addressed because it was the same fear and feeling in my body that I got when I worked in the kitchen as a sushi chef,” dang I dont want to be rolling and making sushi for the rest of my life, or when I was workin in landscaping…”dang . I dont to be cutting down honeysuckle and mulching gardens my whole life…. And so it is!!! No matter whether you work in a 9-5 job locked in a cycle or whether you work for yourself w “flexible hours” you can still find yourself in the same systems that burn you out.
As I read through so many messages and noticed the response to the absence of the basket tops and dresses and noticed people leaving, I realized the depth of attachment people had to those designs. It wasn’t just about loving the pieces, but an attachment had formed around them—and I completely understand that sentiment. I, too, was attached and dependent on those designs and it felt like my whole creative career was dependent on them!. But whilst also on this journey of inner healing, I notice the dependency within in this system might someday be the very thing that might break me and Zhinh in the future, you see? Everything is connected. How you do one thing is how you do everything. But it was in recognizing this attachment that I realized how crucial it was to make this change. I believe that’s when change becomes the most important—when we feel the pull of comfort, but know in our hearts that we need to evolve.
I realized that in order to preserve my relationship with the basket style, I needed to lay it to rest before I ended up resenting the design altogether. And it’s a good thing I did, because now I feel free—free to explore new ideas, and open to the possibility of bringing it back someday, but in a smarter way. Giving myself that space has allowed me to slowly rekindle my love for the design, without feeling confined by it.
If I hadn’t decided to make these changes, I would’ve never been able to see the full extent of what I’m capable of or the depth of what I can master. Staying in my comfort zone would have limited me, keeping me from exploring all the possibilities that lie ahead. There’s so much more to discover—so much untapped creativity and potential that I wouldn’t have reached if I hadn’t embraced this evolution. And if growth is what you seek then.. its never ending…Sometimes, stepping away from what’s familiar is the only way to truly grow and expand thats one big reason why I had to leave Ohio. Life was just way to familiar that the familiar started feeling claustrophobic.
Making a change as an artist is hard, or rather as a human-being in general especially when you’ve built an audience over time around a certain product and niche. It can feel like you’ve unintentionally created a cage for yourself. But I strive to stay true to myself because that’s what Zhinh is about. I started feeling pigeonholed, like I had become a production house of basket tops and dresses, yes I would dabble in a few other styles here and there but the basket styles was what everyone was waiting for it seemed. My skills and creative ideas extend far beyond the basket style, stretching billions and trillions of miles and more. I’m here to explore, bask, and discover the full expansiveness of my creativity. My journey is about more than what I've done so far; it’s about bringing to life the designs I dangerously dreamt of as a child and young adult. I’m determined to manifest those dreams into reality and, one day, have the financial resources to bring them to life without limitations.
In ways, having a niche is wonderful but can make you feel boxed in, reducing your work to something easily consumed and categorized, leaving not much room for more even more expression in which we were meant too explore. I’m not here to be consumed, or fit into a neat little box. I’m here to be experienced in every fleeting moment and change in dance—to evoke emotion, to inspire, to challenge perspectives, and to create connections and expand my mind/creativity/expressions because if I’m doing that, then the collective is also receiving that.
I’m sharing this because I want to express the immense gratitude I have for those who have been with me through all the shifts and transformations, seeing the broader vision of what Zhinh truly is. I am moved to tears when I think about how launching these new channels and subcategories of Zhinh, with new approaches and styles, has been so warmly received. I have the most loyal and loving customers, and nearly all of them are repeat customers. I feel so honored and sometimes overwhelmed by the outpouring of love and the heartfelt messages I receive.
But this path, especially this year, has also taught me how to truly receive love. Not just acknowledge it, but fully receive it and I’m still learning too. So thank you . For the opportunity too. <3